Meghan Kelly
High Conflict Divorce Coach
My name is Meghan Kelly. I once had a different last name. In January 2018, with two young children under five, I made the very scary choice to separate from my husband. I must make a very intentional point here and say that I am a huge proponent of marriage. My incredible parents have been together since they were teenagers and married for over 45 years. My three younger siblings share strong, beautiful marriages with their spouses, and I am surrounded by loads of friends who demonstrate what it’s like to experience secure, devoted relationships. I am not a proponent of divorce. It is hard. It is a last resort. I believe in trying everything to save a marriage if you have the patience and capacity for doing the work. That said, making it work requires two, willing, accountable people, and if both are not willing, there comes a point where there is no chance for resuscitation.
For me, I reached that point. I was no longer staying for the kids. I was leaving for them. I was no longer willing to sacrifice myself. I needed to save the tiny glimmer of myself that I could pick up, take with me, nurture and heal so I could show up for my girls in a way they deserved.
My life force, which once was vibrant and hopeful, had faded to a dull, feeble, flickering light. Yet still a light.
I was still there, holding hands with courage and determination ready to walk the path before me, in which I could envision a clearing where my light could radiate once again with strength. I could not control how he behaved, so I looked at what I could control. And I took action.
In April 2018, I legally filed to divorce. Our divorce was final in November 2019. I was granted full legal and physical custody of my girls following a separate trial that concluded in December 2019. Prior to that, I was introduced to a wonderful man through mutual friends. We began dating and creating memories, and on Christmas Eve 2020 we exchanged vows before our immediate families and said, “I do.”
Today, my girls are thriving. We have a nearly three-year-old son who makes us all smile. My heart is so full, and for the first time in a long time, I feel exactly where I am meant to be – living an authentic life and in a loving relationship rooted in genuine friendship, common interests, mutual respect, and a shared love for our time as a family.
For many years prior to separating from my ex, I struggled. A lot. My marriage was deeply flawed. Our lives continued on together, but emotionally and mentally we had grown apart. Contrasting interests. Opposing values. Incongruent communication methods. I logged what seemed like countless hours with my therapist and went on a journey that led me to where I am today.
Today, I feel like a new person. A person who was once so sad, so heartbroken, so lost, so weak…. now happy, fulfilled, a more capable mom, a much better partner and her true, authentic self. I have learned a LOT. About the impact of trauma, finding my worth, setting reasonable expectations, trusting my gut, creating boundaries, discovering my non-negotiables, and realizing the long game. In looking back on what I have learned and how I have grown, I have realized that my purpose here is to share my story and help other women. Help them free themselves from unhealthy relationships and cycles, and find ways to live the lives they are meant to lead — all the while, holding their children as their guiding light!
Many women find themselves in this place. Since my divorce became common knowledge among friends and acquaintances, my phone has received numerous calls and texts from women curious about what happened, how I left, how things were going. I’ve spoken with women who were married to men they believed were narcissists, women who feared their husbands, women who had no say and were incredibly controlled and manipulated, and women who found themselves paralyzed by anxiety in the face of ending the marriage. Women who felt and depressed. Moms who didn’t know how they could survive if they divorced, and were terrified of the effects such action would have on their children.
I have been a relatable voice at the other end of the phone for many, and remain dedicated to guide and support other women so they can free themselves from their racing hearts and overwhelmed, depressing thoughts. I am also here to help guide them towards harnessing their confidence, truth, awareness of their worth and capacity for healthy love.
Allow this space to serve as a source of hope. Have faith in creating a better, more fulfilling life. I am open to share my story and will give you a safe space to share yours.
Once married. Once divorced. Now free and found!